A long time ago, I was 14 maybe 15, I had a two tone suit. No, not two tone like The Specials, but proper two tone. Tonic, where the material is two different colour threads, cross weaved to create a beautiful shimmer. Tonic became popular with the original Mods and while I wasn’t that – I’m not that blimmin old – I loved the style. My suit was brown and blue tonic and was just beautiful. Later, I got married in a blown chalkstripe zoot, like Neal Cassady wore in On The Road. Still got that one

I’ve always loved suits. Always. Forties style, double breasted. Chalkstripe, not pinstripe. Louder the better. I was Bogart, now I’m more Melly. Sometimes though, standing out isn’t such a great thing. Not long ago, I was in That London on the tube. It was late. There was a group of four lads…

“Did you win, mate? Did you win?” one of them said, looking at his mates for the laugh. 

I just looked straight ahead. Didn’t engage. 

“The fancy dress competition mate. Did you win it?” he laughed, trying to up the ante. 

“No, I came second to some twat in high street jeans and trainers” I didn’t say, because while I’m well dressed, I’m not stupid. 

You don’t get that here. One of the things I love about being in Brighton is mostly I get “Dapper, mate” or maybe “Cool suit, fella”.  

I was thinking about this because there’s a shop in the ‘hood that sells clothes I haven’t got a clue about. I went past the hairy bikers shop and there’s a pair of mechanic’s overalls hanging in the window. What’s that about? I have no idea what that’s about. Is it a sales thing? Are you supposed  to buy them? Am I supposed to walk past and think “Mechanic’s overalls. That’s really cool. That’s what I want to look like”?  In fairness, I’m. guessing they’re vintage mechanic’s overalls. Maybe they’re selvedge mechanic’s overalls. We’re getting into some serious cloth now. Maybe it’s an aspiration thing. I wanna hang out where the guys in the mechanic’s overalls hang out. I have no idea. And you know what? I like that. I like that there’s stuff I just don’t understand. I’ve just had a rather spendid blue and white tartan linen suit made. Six button, double breasted, no vents. Proper. I’ve got a friend who’ll spend more on a pair of jeans than that suit cost to have made. A pair of jeans. I wouldn’t wash the car in a pair of jeans. OK, I don’t own a pair of jeans, but that’s detail. Curiously, the friend in question is also a biker. I make no judgement. 

Like I say, what I like about being here is that I can look really good and the bikers can dress on mechanic’s overalls and everyone’s happy. We all just get on with it. (I could get all Hallmark card and go off on one about how we’re a rainbow community, all different and yet all the same, but… let’s not). Actually it’s a bit odd because, in full disclosure, the bikers won’t talk to us. Their call. Different idea about community, I guess. Or maybe they do try to talk to us and we just can’t hear them over the very manly noise of their very manly bikes. (I never did get over my parents not getting me a Chopper)

Next to the mechanic’s overalls, there’s a lumberjack shirt. Can you imagine what the twat on the tube would say to that?