Once upon a time, not so long ago, it was a clear view along the beach from King Alfred to Millionaire’s Row – as the gull flies at least. But these days, there’s an increasing selection of landing stages for an ageing bird as Hove Beach fills with eateries, and happily, the pickings are getting better and better. At Rockwater, we may have found that all that glitters isn’t necessarily the gold that we gulls demand from our leftovers, but the Fish Shack with its fresh, locally caught fish and seafood, both raw to take home and freshly prepared, is excellent news indeed. 

But it’s Babble that has had the gulls gathering; Sam of Slam Tacos is in charge of the menu and buying his meat from Barfields Butchers and much of the rest from Shrub, names that fans of the Gull About Town will recognise as a mark of excellence.  The menu may sound like it’s luring in the festival crowd with its pork shoulder tacos, its fish tacos, charred broccoli tacos and a double slam burger, but when the dairy comes from Northiam, it’s a sign that there’s more to this pleasuredome than meets the bird’s eye.

Catching a thermal east to Tourist Town, an aroma hits your bird’s beak from a distant memory. Great Uncle Gulliver, a legend in the gull community for his tales of travel way off the migratory routes, would have the young gulls rapt as he told of roadside cafés and street food where birds had only to perch patiently for the most delicious leftover rice and noodles.  Could the spirit of his stories have really made their way to Brighton? So it seems; Roti King in Ship Street was inspired by the same roadside cafes in Ipoh, Malaysia, and is now part of a chain of cool restaurants in London. With main man, Sugen Gopal’s first book out, and a massive following on Instagram, it looks like the famous fat noodles, Char Kway Teow, and the rotis, hand-stretched in full view of customers, spun and served with a little fish kari, will be thrilling more than the gulls.

And so, to home, to West Hill where your gull again catches a waft of something new. The Sussex Yeoman, once a legend in its own lunchtime, has been recovering slowly from COVID. Your bird has been watching THE former hotspot for Sunday roasts try to recover for years. So, when the evocative aroma of beef and Chianti ragu, slow-cooked for hours began to rise from its kitchen, she formed an orderly queue with her feathered friends to get first pickings. Yup, it was the unmistakable taste of Pasta Evangelists, the finish-at-home, restaurant standard food delivery service, one of the clever inventions to emerge from that stressful period of fight or flight. 

Waddling up the road to her favourite rooftop to watch the sun set, your gull pops over to say goodnight to her favourite shopkeeper and pick at some of the avocado leftovers outside. But wait… Can it be that West Hill’s iconic community leader, the godfather of last minute green peppers, the best tap dancer in the neighbourhood has left the building! And what’s this? Shelf after shelf of… (whisper it) crisps? Your gull, suddenly finding a second wind beneath her wings, joins in with the crowd of gulls, a-gaggle with tales, some taller than others perhaps, of child-level chocolates at the counter. And we’re not squawking about those made directly with cocoa growers in Ghana and the Ivory Coast. As she bends her head under her wing, she sighs sadly. One claw forward, she reminds herself, and dreams of a new tomorrow.